This is seriously shit. I'm sick of feeling like this.
Why the fuck do i always go for the people I can't have. Seriously, am i that fucked up in the head that I just cant let go?

Its so easy to think that its possible he's thinking about me, and that he likes me, because thats what i want to hear. Its just the thought of him really not being interested anymore that i cant even bring myself to thinking of.

How can someone just completly stop talking to someone? When they've said how much they're in love with you? How is that even possible! I can't do that, its fucking cruel. I just want him. Too much. It's fucking wrong because its clear he doesnt want me anymore.

Kayy i dont know why i wrote this because its just bullshit that makes no sense. My head hurts and my chest feels weird and i just wanna go to bed now. I wanna ring him. Just wanna hear him speak like once, i want him to tell me that he doesnt like me anymore instead of just being blanked. I'd rather have my heart broken by him telling me the truth rather than have it broken after wondering for 3 weeks about how he feels. I swear i must have been a murderer or something in a former life cause nothing seems to go right for me in terms of who i fall for. I know im feeling sorry for myself but to be honest, there's no one else who feels sorry for me because they really dont get it. Anyone iv told just says "you need to forget him hannah" and then the rare few, like Porsh who do know, cant empathize at the moment because they have their own lives and their own guys. Its understandable obviously, im not expecting them to like reject their guys for me haha! No i just wish stuff would make a bit more sense cause im going insane here.

kay bye.